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Hello Again?

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So hi? Hmm..probably no one will be reading this.

It's been 3 years since my last post when I decided to stay silent. Well, here I am again, almost a doctor and has changed status from single to married (yeay!) happily being Choi's lady.

There is one month left before PRO exam, our final exam as medical student.  6 years guys, 6 years! Orang kahwin pun dah boleh dapat anak dua orang. Sementara semua orang tengah berhempas pulas nak final exam, I got admitted into the ward due to acute gastritis. Orang melayu panggil 'gastrik'. I refused to get admitted but man, that 2 injections of Pethidine (painkiller) did not work on me. Tersadai la aku kat ward 3 hari. Total disconnected from the world when I supposed to be on Emergency posting.


Time passed,

3 hari tak buat tutorial
3 hari tak datang clinical
3 hari tak buat study group
3 hari tak study. Gila

Dunia yang semua benda nak kena rushing stop kejap. I felt sad though, sebab 'kena-admit-hospital' tak termasuk dal…

Sayonara!

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For some reasons, seperti betapa tak matured nya diri ini dan terus rasa malu bler baca semula ayat budak-budak di zaman dahulu kala, terpancul terus dari mulut 'What was I thinking!'. See, I'm growing up be matured hew~. So the point is, I'm no longer using this blog. Create yang baru. Muahaha! Kalau bernasib baik jumpa la kot. Can't wait to post about my trip to Krabi in my new blog! Till then, adios amigos!


To Miss Tasneem

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*khas untuk orang yang baru 22 tahun & bakal final exam lagi 10 days*

Salam,

Firstly aku tulis kat sini sebab mobile internet aku dah nak habis, and because it's weekend yaw! *my guilty please me time*

Rasanya aku orang last wish belated birthday ko. hewhewhew. berzaman kau jah. Sweet 22 baby, may you have great future ahead. Please please please live your life without fear. Go beyond the border as you have your own potential. To be afraid what comes to you, is a waste. (Berterabur grammar, ko paham la kan main point nye)

Sebagai hadiah, aku suruh hrithik roshan kasi ni kat ko.



Dilon me tum Apni Betaabiyan leke chal rahe ho, To zinda ho tum. Nazar me khwaabon ki bijliyan leke chal rahe ho, To zinda ho tum. Hawa ke Jhokon ke jaise aazad rehno seekho Tum, Ek dariya ke jaise lehron mein behna seekho Tum.
Har ek lamhe se tum milo khole apni Baahein, Har ek pal ek naya sama dekhe Nigahein.
Jo apni ankhon mein hairanian leke chal rahe ho, To zinda ho tum. Dilon mein tum apni betabian…

If you see the mansion, you will leave the dollhouse.

Sebenarnya dah lama nak tulis pasal ni, tapi tak tahu nak tulis apa. Apa yang akan tertulis, memang direct spontan sebab tak plan and I just spill it out.

My late grandma left on 21st April, well it's not the only thing happened that night. I lost 2 persons, not in one day but in one night. I couldn't imagine that I could actually bear the burden that much and only few persons knew.

I was so traumatized.

I cried so badly, so badly that I couldn't stand straight. The table is only 5 steps from the bed but I couldn't walk straight. Then I had bad headache and I remember I slept with the picture of my late grandma beside me. That's all.

The next morning, I went to class as usual, like nothing happened. Thank God, the eyebag was hidden behind the spectacles. I even diagnosed the case correctly. "You are a good student. I've been observing you". How could the doctor said that when my mind was....blank like an empty box.

 Lost 2 persons in one night for me…

A Perfect Quote

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Because I'm a human too.

'Ko kuat nyaahhh!'

'Hey ana yang kuat tanpa muscle berketul-ketul'

'You are strong enough'


Semua orang cakap aku kuat.
Tapi diorang tak tau, kadang-kadang aku tak nak pun jadi kuat.
Sebab..
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Penat.

Nenek

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*air mata ni, dah tahan-tahan pun keluar lagi* Stop grieving, rasulullah s.a.w tak suka.

Mon, 21 April 2014. 21:57 pm

Too many bad news in one day, salah satunya
Dapat tahu, nenek dah kembali ke rahmatullah.

Sebelum nenek meninggal. Dah lama dah simpan, dah lama dah rasa tak sedap hati, dah lama dah rasa kacau bilau. Kalau ikutkan dah tempah tiket balik.

All I could do, was asking my cousin and my mom,

'Nenek makan tak?'

'Nenek bercakap tak?'

'Nenek macam mana?'

and it goes on.

Tak boleh concentrate study, tu pasal la jawab end-block tunggang-langgang. kalau terfikir je terus tido. Takpun terjun je swimming pool. No, I dont want anyone to see my tears, the pillow was wet though. Up until now, even my roommate doesn't know. Tasneem pernah pesan, 'Don't bite more than you can chew', tapi kalau dah tak boleh kunyah, telan je la kan. Monologue je la dalam hati, Allah Maha Mendengar. Kalau Allah nak tarik nyawa nenek dalam masa terdekat, biarlah dalam k…